December 2009
28 posts
(303): At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.? (1-303): At about the same time you guys weren’t burritos.
WatchHahaha
(504): I'm buying a chandelier at walmart. WHO'S CLASSY NOW, BITCHES.
“All I want for christmas is for Santa to curbstomp my sister.”
WatchAfter all, you can’t have manslaughter without laughter.
Decided to try and hit up the treadmill for a few minutes today. Didn’t like it. Put the cat on instead. He didn’t like it either.
“(617): I just used shampoo as lube. Why? Because i’m worth it.”
Deepquotes, brought to you by N.
“Fuck it. I’m going home to be fat and antisocial.”
“So like…I was putting on my mascara, and I realised, I should just be nice to everyone.”
“Sometimes I just get these meat cravings.”
“He’s just like a fat baby, who ate another fat baby.”
“It was horrible! His hands were so skinny and bony!” “You’d...
“Here’s a little Dreidel,
that’s small and made of clay,
but...”
“You have perfect blowjob lips.”
Shout out.
Dear _________,
I have come to the conclusion that I would rather fuck a cactus while listening to GWAR than be within a hundred foot radius of you. The way you think is no way at all… maybe you should go back to selling coke like you did before you moved back here. You’re about as useful to humanity as Vinny from Jersey Shore, but at least Vinny isn’t living with his mom.
“Awhile ago I read in a magazine that you raise your eyebrows when you’re...”
“(601) You burnt your salmon and tried to mail it, post marked to: Starving Kid...”
“(240): Squirrels and blue jays and dove-like things. They’re just...”
“You smell like dead animal, wanna hook up?”